Do these sound familiar?
When helping my clients liberate themselves from mounds of possessions taking up space in their homes and offices, we inevitably get snagged by certain items.
No matter how committed one is to getting rid of clutter, these are 5 common reasons (excuses?) given for wanting to hold onto something.
1. “I might need it one day.”
2. “We paid good money for that.”
3. “I got that when…”
4. “That belonged to my late…”
5. “I can fix that, or use it for…”
Yes, in each case, that statement is true. So, it’s my job to help find out what else is true that aligns more closely with their goal to live lightly and eliminate as much as possible. Let’s look at these “reasons” one at a time, each with a key to move closer to clarity.
1. “I might need it one day.”
Yes, we cannot tell the future and it is quite possibly the case that you will need a Popeye suit complete with fake muscles someday for Halloween. True. What else is true? That you are immensely creative and resourceful and can come up with a new costume next October. It’s time to let someone else have the corncob pipe. No matter the item, it helps to ask yourself. “Is it worth the space it takes up for the chance it can be used again?” “Is there something else that could meet that potential need?”
Key: remember that the truth is that you are naturally creative and resourceful, now and in the future.
2. “We paid good money for that.”
Yes, expensive items come up for discernment too, and it’s not the whole story if you keep them simply because they were pricey. This is an opportunity to courageously reflect on why you are tempted to keep a designer suit you never wear, or a pair of high-end skis you don’t use. Does the item somehow support a “false sense of prosperity”? Does it align with your taste and values moving forward?
Key: check in with your internal measure of value rather than the original purchase price.
3. “I got that when…”
Yes, objects often serve as souvenirs to help us remember past experiences or reflect who we were in a particular moment. Do you need your high school letter jacket to recall the good old days? Do you have a photo of you wearing that jacket that you can keep instead? Or, could you snap a selfie trying it on today.
Key: allow yourself the possibility of integrating all your past identities into who you are now. (And if you still want a keepsake, get creative about choosing meaningful memorabilia that takes up little space.)
4. “That belonged to my late…”
Yes, we sometimes inherit the belongings of loved ones who are now deceased. It can feel dishonoring to let go of certain items that somehow seem inherently linked to someone we loved and cared for. What would that person wish for you? Did they leave specific wishes for what to do with their possessions? If there is a set of china or a collection of hats, consider selecting just one piece to keep. Do you have a photo of the person you loved with this item? How might you transform or release these items to bring them (and you) new life?
Key: there are many different ways (other than storing stuff) that we can honor beloved people who have gone before.
5. “I can fix that or use it for…”
Yes, you are creative and can see the potential in repairing or re-purposing things. You could melt down old candles and make new ones, and you can get a new lampshade for that otherwise perfectly good lamp. But you haven’t. It’s also true that someone else could do it, and in fact there are many other creative and resourceful people in the world, many of whom go to thrift stores looking for such projects. Help them out and free yourself from any obligation to be the one who fixes every broken item with potential.
Key: creative transformation is abundantly possible, and you aren’t responsible for doing all of it yourself.
6. [Bonus Excuse] “I have fond memories of using that.”
Yes, objects anchor memories. The look and feel of my mother’s teapot conjure up moments as warm as a cup of tea itself. But the truth is, we rarely make a whole pot of tea, and this one was never very good at keeping the tea hot. So, we snapped a picture and keep the memory in our hearts.
Key: our hearts can hold lots more love than our cupboards.
So, be on the lookout. Do you hear yourself stating any of these reasons?
Of course you are always free to choose any object for keeping. I encourage you, however, to entertain other possibilities first. Practice some gentle reflection and tough love to make your choice in light of your highest intentions for freeing up your life and creative energy.
Peace & Creativity,
Amy
